Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
