Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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