it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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