I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
