She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize