i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
