I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Barsexuality is the new black.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
