so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Farmville is her only friend.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
