I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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