This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
