dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize