how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
