Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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