You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
