I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
