forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I want her autograph on my taint
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Randomize
