just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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