Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Randomize
