i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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