Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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