Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Go christen that room with your naked body.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
