i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
