So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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