i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
