he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
