I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize