evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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