When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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