If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
In the future we'll all be gay
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
