So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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