I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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