i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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