She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
