Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Randomize
