I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
