When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
