escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
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