Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
