what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
