butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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