Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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