Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
