It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
