Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
