I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
