he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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