420 ftw
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
