Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The struggles of a small town man whore
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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