that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
