So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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