we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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